My perfect umbrella

My perfect umbrella:

Gas powered, spring loaded detachable top, with a sharp tip. Should be moderately usable in case I wanna kill a target 50 mt's away.

Should be able to withstand high pressure air, by which I mean, it should double up as a parachute.

Well, if it's not too much to ask, make it waterproof as well.

Pravin's handbag.

I have a colleague of mine who is thorroughly confused about his sexuality. . Gay/Straight .. Male/Female/Others ;)

Anyhow I wanna rant about his bag.

His handbag has Cream and deodorants, and moisturizer , and lip balm, and lip gloss...

Rubber bands etc.

Ask me how it's different from any Girl's handbag, and i would be speechless.

Wondering if it has tampons or Sanitary Pads too !!!!

Stand up urinals are NOT indian.

How the hell is one supposed to pee whilst wearing 'Ethinic' Kurta pajamas ?